Mark at Intake..."Mr. Too Cool For School"
Getting the Mugshot...SMILE...!
Getting fingerprinted...Can I have a WetNap? This stuff stains you know...
"...When I think about you, I touch myself..."
Hey! My chest looks DAMN good in this holding cell mirror...!
I swear I'm innocent...My wife made the whole thing up...
I'm not like YOU people...
Uh, buddy? Let go my leggo, will ya...?
Can I request turn down service, and an extra bankie...?
***Thanks to all the friends (Nicole!) who sat and giggled and drank coffee
with me early that morning, while we waited for the jerk to show up on camera...
Thanks also to all my long distance friends, many of whom also watched it all live,
and were "virtually" there in support. :)
Thanks as well to the band, who crawled out of bed BEFORE DAWN in Hawaii to take my hysterical calls. (!)
To all of my virtual hand holders and cheering section... :-*
with me early that morning, while we waited for the jerk to show up on camera...
Thanks also to all my long distance friends, many of whom also watched it all live,
and were "virtually" there in support. :)
Thanks as well to the band, who crawled out of bed BEFORE DAWN in Hawaii to take my hysterical calls. (!)
To all of my virtual hand holders and cheering section... :-*
Current Pertinent Stats:Name: Mark William GranieriLocation: Mission Hills, CA (With his mom, in her trailer no less) Age (real age): 55 (Claims 36 - 39 ~ Yes, I know he looks REALLY young - Ask to see his drivers license) Birthdate: 11/05/1956 Education: GED - No college, despite what his dating profiles say. Current Pic (Top Only) (note the ESPN shirt, some things never change) Lower Pic? (Bottom Only) One of the ones he's using on some dating sites now. Ladies? THAT pic is 20 years old. (Note the wedding ring) Warrants: Felony Auto Theft warrants in Colorado (he skipped bail). Multiple Misdemeanor warrants, and apparently 1 additional felony warrant in Arizona. Warrants in both states include: Auto Theft, shoplifting, etc. (Verified by the various TV shows I've been on as well) Most recent escapade? Calling a lady in Colorado Springs with small children who was selling her car, offering to meet her at a mall to "test drive" the car, then leaving her and her toddler and infant standing in the mall parking lot while he, and her car, and her packages "test drove" to Phoenix. Available on these online dating sites: DateFinder.com (as "markymark") DreamDates.com (as "romeo") True.com (as "tonytrue") TrueBeginnings.com (as "tonytrue") YahooPersonals (as "mgranieri56" and "mark_passion_love") Match.com (as "mgranieri") eHarmony.com (as "mgranieri") Webdate.com (as "mgranieri") SingleMe.com (as "romeo") IwantU.com as "hotscorp", CoupleMe.com as "romeo" NoCheatersDate.com as "romeo", Place4Friends.com as "markymark27" PerfectMatch.com as "Mark" LocalHellos.com as "romeo54" LoveByNet.com as "romeo54" MatchRanger.com as "Markymark24" MatchMaker.com as "LTRNUT689" and then it gets weird... Also available on these adult "swinger" sites: AdultFriendFinder.com, AshleyMadison.com, Alt.com (all as "comeandgetit42") IwantU.com as "hotscorp" SexSearch.com as "duemeallnight" HornyMatches.com as "hotnhorny4u" WildHotDates.com as "hotromeo54" AmateurMatch.com as "romeo54" PassionAds.com as "romeo54" AdultDatingFriends.com as "hotromeo54" ClimaxPersonals.com as "romeo54" AdultActionCam.com as "markymark2482" and a half dozen more... *** HOT SCOOP Ladies!!! He has sworn off condoms as they're "not neccessary", and besides, they're "annoying"...Based on the "swinger site" info above, do ya REALLY wanna go there? At last report, living with someone who has no clue he's still "dating" via the sites above. Broke up with her once a long time ago, only to tell a friend that he's miss her cat, but not her - That he was only with her because she paid his bills and fed him. |
 
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(*The above online dating site information, and the photo, are from women who have corresponded with him on these various sites, as is the following "personal" e-mail he tends to send in one permutation or another to all of them (If you're Christian, he talks about his abiding faith, if you're divorced, he talks about how he's changed since his tragic divorce, if you love pets, he tells sob stories about how I "took" all his dogs away from him, despite the fact that he had one of them for 2 months, and didn't take her outside except to pee, and only fed her occasionally, my neighbor had to confiscate her from him, if you have children, he waxes profound about how very sad it was we never had any and how badly he wants them - Keep in mind there is a VERY good reason we never had any; For the mental, physical, sexual, and emotional health of any potential children)
He finds time to be available on the swinger sites above, but, NOT available for an honest days work however. Mostly due to those pesky background checks those dastardly employers keep running. And girls? He doesn't HAVE a credit card, only his mom's, so when he uses the excuse that he had "trouble" signing up for a premium membership, or is afraid to send his CC info over the 'net, the translation is: "I don't have a credit card, can't get one, and since I make minimum wage under the table at the boiler rooms I work at, and can't get a bank account, I have to wait until mom gives me money, or I save enough to get a money order."
Personal note to the girls on the dating sites, falling for this charmer:
He lies, he cheats, he steals (literally, auto theft, check fraud/forgery, shoplifting, etc.)...He sleeps around (if being the original 60 second wonder can REALLY be considered sleeping around (see HIS version of how good he is in the bedroom below - Teeheeheheeeeeeee) - Almost not like cheating at all when it's THAT speedy, huh?)...If you start a relationship with him, and you break up with him, for whatever reason, he WILL stalk you; you, your co-workers, your family...He borrows money from you and all your relatives, with NO intentions of paying it back...
He writes the same, EXACT, boiler plate e-mails to all the girls he corresponds with on dating sites, maybe switching around a paragraph or even adding God comments if the situation warrants - Does this sound familiar?:
"...Hi! My name is Mark. I'm half Italian half Irish 6'2" about 200 lbs. and stay in shape. I've been told I'm tall dark and handsome. I'm outgoing, adventurous, spontaneous, passionate (what an understatement, I'm a scorpio) and attentive. I'm also so much more.
When I was divorced 2 years ago, I thought it was the worst thing ever to happen to me. I now know it was actually the best thing ever. I've learned so much and am such a better man for it. I'm more thoughtful, sincere, accepting, forgiving, compassionate, caring, kind hearted and honest. I believe in a higher power and take comfort in knowing He has a plan for me.
There is so much more, and I'd like to know you better. If you write me back I promise you won't regret it. Please take care,
Mark..."
(Emphasis on the word "honest" in the above boiler plate e-mail is mine...)
My personal favorite in some of the profiles and e-mails he sends out is this:
...I've never had a complaint from the bedroom. I know how to make a lady happy. I would treat her with the respect and tenderness she deserves even while I make her scream with pleasure. Again and again...
BwaHAhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Err, 'scuse me...Sorry, I'm better now. ;)
Having been married to this inveterate liar for 17 years, it was fascinating, but not surprising, that after prattling on and on about how changed he is, the first thing he does is lie on all his profiles about his age - Oddly enough, he did that when we first met too...I was stupid enough to excuse it away. He talks a big game about "learning to be a better man", "having a higher power", etc., but it's all bunk. He lies about anything and everything, just because he can, still, Alanon be damned. Rest assured that whatever e-mails he's sending ONLY to you, whatever he's saying on the phone to you, calling you "cutie" or "sweetheart" or whatever, whatever promises or protestations of love he's making to you, or anything more intimate with you, he's doing the exact same thing to a dozen other women at the same time based on some of the e-mails I've gotten.
I particularly like this little "white" lie he sent to several new "love of his life's" after accidentally sending them e-mails meant for a completely different potential target, err, date, on yet another dating site: "...I don't even know how my picture got on yahoo personals. They must have got it from e-harmony from last year. I'm not even a member of yahoo personals..."
Yes, that's right, ALL the dating services just randomly pass their subscriber info back and forth. Don't they? Never mind the fact that to do anything on Yahoo Personals, you have to fill in the little random generator box. Each time you do anything.
If you are unsure (you don't know me after all), don't take MY word for it, ask questions, look at the web site above, test him:
Ask him his real age, better yet, ask him to see his drivers license...Then ask him why he lied, and what else he may be lying about?
Ask him who he's lived with for the last 3 years, and why?
Ask him who bought his car for him? Who pays his bills?
Ask him of there's any criminal background you need to be aware of, because you have a right to protect yourself...
You don't have to tell him you know anything...But! They are all reasonable questions for anyone thinking of meeting a stranger for the first time to ask.
Now he justs waits for his Mom to die so he can get some money, if he hasn't drained her dry yet.
(Poor thing... While she IS 100% responsible for creating and feeding the psychoses and neuroses and violent tendancies of this "person", she still has no clue how he's using her.)
